109 - I Want Expansion!

So many of us crave expansion — more capacity, more visibility, more money, more love.

But expansion without contraction is like inhaling without exhaling. It’s not sustainable.

In this episode, I explore why growth requires both — the up-wave and the down-wave. And I offer the acronym PRISM as a guide for cycling between them.

Tune in for support building capacity and riding big waves. Then join the waitlist for Resourced.

Episode Transcript:

Sarah Tacy [00:00:06]:

Hello, welcome, I'm Sarah Tacy and this is Threshold Moments, a podcast where guests and I share stories about the process of updating into truer versions of ourselves. The path is unknown and the pull feels real. Together we share our grief, laughter, love and life saving tools. Join us. Hello and welcome to Threshold Moments. I am redoing this podcast, I recorded it and I'm just gonna say that I'm really working these ideas out in real time. Both in that there are lived experiences, there are studies behind it that I know, but I'm attempting to put together an acronym as a way to help us remember when we're working towards expansion, whether it's financial, relational or exposure like visibility, ways that we can support ourselves and really prepare for waves of contraction. And when we are not overly attached and don't let the hooks of the negative stories that can come.

Sarah Tacy [00:01:32]:

If we have shame around contraction or don't feel good when it happens, then we can be in a downward spiral. So the idea with expansion is not that there's expansion without contraction, but that over time it is an upward spiral. There is a growth in our capacity to be with more of the things we want to be with in life. So I say welcome, welcome, welcome. And I just remember and again the things that people come to me with is that idea and that inquiry of expand, expand, hold more money, hold more visibility, hold more love. And as I say that, I also remember that these are energies that like to move through. And if now that I'm thinking of blood and I'm thinking about the way that blood moves through our bodies, that the capacity has to do with the flexibility of our veins and arteries, not the stiffness of them, not the rigidity. But really what is the container that allows for the flexibility of expansion and contraction.

Sarah Tacy [00:02:45]:

Expansion without contraction is like inhaling without exhaling. And biologically growth needs this oscillation. So if we look at this in a few different places, we can say our autonomic nervous system cycles between sympathetic mobilization and parasympathetic recovery. In the polyvagal theory there are all different variations of this that create more of a rainbow effect of saying oh, we can have healthy, sympathetic, healthy fast. Think of like a basketball player or conversation that you're really into that has some speed and there is a little, possibly a little adrenaline of focus and what's next but enough safety that we still feel in our body. So again we are going to have the sympathetic go get em or fight or flight or more of not either or, but more of the parasympathetic which might be a slow meditation, a slow walk, or perhaps a collapse where you just like can't get out of bed. Right? These are like, we can have hyper too much and hypo not enough. But we can also grow our capacity to have a really beautiful range.

Sarah Tacy [00:04:05]:

HRV is a beautiful example of this. This is our heart rate variability. And it's literally the variation between these beats that show us that our health has. That our health is healthy, that we have more adaptability. It is a great reflection of the health of our nervous system. Our HPA axis, which is the hypothalamus pituitary adrenal, manages your stress chemistry. And this also needs periods of deactivation to rest. So again, if it's chronically on, then we're in chronic stress mode.

Sarah Tacy [00:04:48]:

Our adrenals are chronically going, and it tends to be like all out, all the time and collapse. Or if we are growing our capacity for expansion and contraction so that we can have an upward spiral of what is possible in our life, then we want to have small parts in time where that axis is like high, high focus, high energy, high activation, and a lot more of the time, actually, that it can rest and restore. In nature. Oh, this is so good. Okay. In nature, I have decorative grass outside, which is the type of grass that one does not mow. It is the type of grass that might be more of like a bright yellowish green or, you know, different widths. It's not again.

Sarah Tacy [00:05:48]:

And it can grow three feet high, or mine right now is seven feet high. And when we first planted it, they were like these little bushes of decorative grass. Every fall they start to wilt. And then we cut it back and it goes underground and it replenishes in the soil. And then in the spring, when it starts sprouting up, it is mind boggling to see the expansion. So you think it took six months to rest and recover, a few months before that to just like, let it fall apart and it starts growing again. The growth is exponential, and mine right now is like, say seven feet. And the really cool thing is that every year it gets a little bigger, just like a pine tree.

Sarah Tacy [00:06:43]:

Every year in the spring, it puts out another, say, 4 to 6 inches. So this is an example of an upward spiral of growth that you have expansion and contraction, and yet the growth trajectory is upward. Now, of course, we're all going to die, and so there will be a time in our lives where we're going to be like, I want less, I want less, I want to give more of my stuff away. I want to simplify, I want less. So we get to be aware of the microwaves and the macro waves within our own life. In relationships, you can have times where you're super tight with a friend and you're seeing them all the time. And I'm thinking of some of my friends where we used to get up really early, work out hard, jump in the ocean, sauna and be home by 7:15. And it was so great.

Sarah Tacy [00:07:38]:

And then all of our lives and schedules kind of shifted and so it's not as consistent, but it hasn't turned into an all or nothing of it'll never be that close again. Right. It has its own tides. And when I think in my marriage we have times that have gotten really hard and we have times that have been so connected and clear and grateful and times in between. And if I hold on to any of those waves, it can be really disturbing to my system. I'm going to give a few more examples and then I'm going to talk about when we hook into the down wave, how it can pull us down so much longer. So then we'll go over skills that we can use to unhook ourselves from the down waves, learn how to support ourselves in the down wave, so we're really riding the wave with a little more agency so that the up wave comes with more ease and often a little sooner. So first I want to say I've talked about in the body, in nature and relationships.

Sarah Tacy [00:08:41]:

I guess I'm a nervous system in nature and relationships. And in finances, we see this too, right? When somebody wins the lottery. There are so many studies that show the depression that follows and how quickly people lose money because they haven't slowly built over time in their nervous system, the safety of having that much money. But when you have that much money, you also need boundaries and you need to learn how to invest it, what to save, where to spend, and when you grow your finances slowly over time, these are skills that you grow along the way. And your nervous system also prepares to go, ooh, I came up against an edge. It was challenging. I contracted a little bit, I integrated and I was able to take the next step again. That way we can have more steady growth.

Sarah Tacy [00:09:38]:

And I think about theory, planning, who shows their clients chart. And if you think right down the middle of the chart is a line that's like neutral, your baseline finances, and you're sitting on neutral and you start to go up, say like 1% and it shows that you're like optimistic. Oh my gosh, Everything's going to be great. And then you hit a peak and you're like excitement. And at that peak you start then going down the other side of the mountain. And now you're still above the line of neutral and you can already be in despair. And then you hit that neutral line where you were optimistic before, but now you're heading down and you're in despair and you keep going down and down and down. You go below neutral.

Sarah Tacy [00:10:22]:

And then when you take the turn, it can be like, okay, you know, and we can really get emotionally drawn into these. And the whole point of theory showing their clients this is to say, hey, if we can step off this roller coaster and normalize that, the stock market goes up and down. But if we look over 120 year cycle, we can see that is an upward trajectory over time with ups and downs on that neutral line. So in the body we have cellular divide and they start to multiply. But right next to that multiplication is the importance of apoptosis, which is cell death. With the other aspect being the autophagy, which is the part that helps to. I think of it as like, it's like composting. It's pulling away what's dead and making room for what's new, right? So right next to expansion is contraction.

Sarah Tacy [00:11:23]:

Right next to birth is death. Right next to cell division is cell death. A woman gives birth, that's the ultimate expansion. And then afterwards, there are many practices in many parts of the world where it's 40 days of contraction, meaning 40 days of don't leave the house, 40 days of other people bringing you food, 40 days of like wrapping your body. And I think more appropriately, it's like two years because you are doing an upward trajectory of expansion, because you literally are growing new humans, first in your body, then outside. And so although it feels like contraction, there is still an upward mobility of what is happening, an upward expansion. Lastly, I'll just remind you that when I worked with athletes, we would have them do a new pattern for six seconds. Then we would have them rest until their heart rate was below 120, which was often four to 10 times longer than the amount of activity they put in.

Sarah Tacy [00:12:32]:

So even though it was more rest, recovery, contraction than expansion and outward effort over time, they had an upward trajectory of recovery time and an upward trajectory of speed. And same thing with muscle growth. You have to do the expansion, which causes breakdown, which then leads to expansion. So all of this to say for all my lovely listeners, if we normalize the contraction after an expansion, and if we Set up layers of support. Then we're more likely to go on an upward trajectory instead of getting caught in old loops or getting pulled down into stories that are harmful. What happens when we start to expand? So we have a biological need to expand, right? A biological thing that's like grow, learn what's new, see what fits. But we also have a biological need for safety. And so things that are new, even if they're better for us, appear as threat.

Sarah Tacy [00:13:46]:

So we're having two pulls at the same time. The I must, I can't. I must grow. I can't grow. And we begin to look for the sacred third through small doable pieces that we can take time to be with a contraction and deprogram the stories that this is how it will be forever. And ask questions with our reticular activating system. If you remember, our reticular activating system is the filter at the bottom of the brainstem to filter out what you expect. It is looking to help protect you, it is looking to support your biases, and it is also looking for things that are novel.

Sarah Tacy [00:14:34]:

The way I think we can use it best is to begin to use it for curiosity. So we notice a downward spiral. We catch ourselves because a downward spiral would also get our default mode network, which is also in our brain, to begin looping and ruminating over negative stories that pull us down. When we resource ourselves and we feel calm and in our bodies, resourcing ourselves means that we do things to support our nervous system and the sense of safety in our body. The default mode network then shifts to daydreaming. And as the HPA axis, the one that goes to the adrenals, starts calming down, we have more access to curiosity, which gets the reticular activating system to start seeing possibilities for us. So let me tell you a quick story. I'm noticing my tendency to be like, I'll make it quick.

Sarah Tacy [00:15:42]:

Let me just tell you a story. You may be aware that I just went through one of my biggest launches of my lifetime. I forgot 15, 20 years was very much a word of mouth person. I taught yoga teacher trainings that often other studios filled and sometimes I filled them myself. But I haven't spent a lot of time promoting online and this was an affiliate launch, which means I reached out to near and dear friends whose line of work was similar to mine, overlapped enough, who had enough of the same beliefs and and said, hey, I know this can be risky and a little bit vulnerable, but is there any chance that you would like to share about this program? I'm about to do. And an overwhelming number of them said yes. And the love flooded in. I was unprepared for the amount of, you know, the newsletters that came up from different people, the Instagram lives, the stories and people sharing the way that my work has affected them or I have affected them or their lives and the positive impact.

Sarah Tacy [00:17:07]:

And it was this. I was like, this feels like a wedding. Which means that the oxytocin, the love hormone, the serotonin, the dopamine, the reward hormone, all the things that flood you to make you feel so good were really, really there. At the end of my first live call where there were hundreds of people on it, thousands of people listened to the recording. I got off and I was like, wow. I felt so authentically myself. I felt so in my body. I kept my own rhythm.

Sarah Tacy [00:17:38]:

I did not shape shift for anybody. And then suddenly my body, I was laying on the bench, I was like, what is happening? My body started feeling really uneasy. Like, it's that feeling, do you know that feeling where it's like eat a chocolate chip cookie or like go watch TV or go scroll on Instagram. It's that feeling of like wanting to relieve the sensation of discomfort inside. And I was lucky enough to have a friend call right after, like, hey, how you doing? I'm like, I'm a little surprised. I felt so good during the call and I'm feeling had this vulnerability hangover. And she's like, yep, super normal. This is predictable.

Sarah Tacy [00:18:22]:

And I myself have literally supported friends on this side of a launch too. And I put my feet in the water and I laid on the ground and I just let my body be with the discomfort of essentially my body being like. You just exposed yourself to thousands of people. You know, to be authentic is to be vulnerable. To be vulnerable means people might not like you, you might not survive how you wanted to. I mentally knew that this opting out of urgency was for people to get a feel for, like, do they like me? Would they want to go further? Do they not like me? And of course there was also that part that's just like, I. I also get to be of service. I get to integrate 20 years of work and specifically these last five years and weave them into something so potent, so specific.

Sarah Tacy [00:19:21]:

I was so proud of what I put out. I knew and I gave myself that afternoon to be in the discomfort of the vulnerability hangover, to contract, to not immediately be out in the world, to not immediately be face forward. And I was mid launch and luckily, by co regulating with friends by being with the earth, by just being in the discomfort, but giving my body layers of support. The next day I was like, oh, okay, here I am refocused, clear. And after day three again, it was like months of super focus. I went to a friend's three day ceremony and I found that I did not have the capacity to be there. I thought it might be a good way to integrate and instead I just kept choosing to go back to a different friend's house and just stay in bed and really let my system heal. And resource ended up filling.

Sarah Tacy [00:20:29]:

It could be called a success, but I really had to be on day one of the opening cart with like, oh, if nobody signs up because everyone's like, can I have more of opting out of urgency? Can I have it longer? Can I have it for free? Can I have the slides? Can I do resourced for free? And I was like, wow, really having to be with any story that came up in my head of if the paid program, if nobody signed up, every story that might come up if my business didn't quote unquote, succeed with that. And the stories weren't kind to begin with. And I was able to recognize that you're going to hear when I go through the seven stages of supporting through expansion and contraction so that we can work on this upward trajectory. Was able to recognize, oh, all or nothing stories, big stories means that my protector, my inner protector is really on guard. It's really out there trying to tell me every story of why I should never do this again so that I stay small and stay safe. And I can just see that this is not my neutral state, this is not my resonant state. This is a place where fear is having a louder voice than my inner wisdom. And so I'm going to resource myself here and I'm just going to recognize that I'm in a wave.

Sarah Tacy [00:22:02]:

And the more that my body gets to see that I can survive these waves and I have layers of support in them, the more I can integrate, accept and receive the benefit of contraction and then move forward. What I will say what was really amazing and beautiful and surprising was how many friends reached out like, oh, local friends, friends that I see only when I travel or online and people like getting on calls and walking me through and just like, hey, how you doing? And just this feeling like wow, no matter what how my work does in the world, I'm loved. And that sense of co regulation is a massive thing for the nervous system too because when oxytocin rises, adrenaline starts to fall, which Again, then allows us to get more into curiosity, more into regulation. All right, all of that said, I'm going to take a breath and then notice my feet on the ground. The pee in prism could be pause. So prism, it refracts contraction and expansion into clarity and sustainable upward movement. Again, knowing that the lifespan of us is also going to ask for bigger ways of a downward spiral on purpose, not a dysregulation spiral. So the P is preparation.

Sarah Tacy [00:23:51]:

I'm saying that I'm like, maybe it should be pause. Put them both there. Pause is part of preparation. It's the scaffolding before you need it. It's the daily repetition of things that you know that are good for you. It's also, if you are about to do something financially, visibility wise, relationally, you could say, how can I support my system before I do this thing? Which might be like jumping up and down, shaking it out. It might be a cold plunge in the ocean. It might be a meditation.

Sarah Tacy [00:24:29]:

How do I prepare before this hard conversation or this showing myself to the world? But also the preparation is putting into your schedule possibility, possibly time on the other side for, say, a massage or time to contract on purpose, which can just look like just bopping around your house without a purpose, without doing anything, and saying like, I'm purposely putting aside time to be without a purpose, just bopping around. And so preparation is both the repetitions we do for our nervous system to create a sense of safety and a bigger capacity for range, as well as really strategic things that you can do before, during, and after. If the moment of expansion or relational challenge is anything that you are planning for. Because we know a lot of these things happen when we're not planning, and that is when the repetitions help. For that type of preparation. The R in prism is recognition. So we're going to say there is the micro noticing, the tight jaw, the shallow breath, the hot face. And then the macro narratives that you see are really telling, I should never do this, or this is how it's always been.

Sarah Tacy [00:26:02]:

Every time I get money, I lose money. Every time this, then that whatever physiological state we're in, it will be a match for memories that took place in that same physiological state. Just the same way that when you hear a song that used to play when you were in eighth grade, it brings you right back to that time. Our physiological state does that same thing. So if you are in a place of contraction that also has the activation of shame or fear or protective mechanisms, you will remember every other time that that happened. It does not mean that is the truth of your life. So we recognize. Is my breath shallow? Is it high? Is my face hot? Is my heart beating or am I in a freeze? Are the stories all or nothing stories? Micro noticing, macro narratives.

Sarah Tacy [00:26:57]:

If you can recognize these things, the recognition is enough to know this isn't forever and it's not all true. A little science note here is that interoception and labeling reduces the limbic load and reopens the default motor network, the DMN for flexible thinking. The next one. Okay, the next one. I would love to call it normalization, recognition, normalization, preparation. But it's inter. I'm having an integration so that it actually spells out prism. So the integration is thinking to normalize.

Sarah Tacy [00:27:38]:

And compost is how this integration works. I kind of love the idea of having an integration midway through and not always leaving it till the end. So we get to go. Contraction isn't regression how your brain wires in change. Neuroplasticity thrives on errors and feedback, perceived errors and feedback, or just curiosity and information that comes from lived experiences. This is compost, not collapse. And if it is collapse, adding layers of support, which is the S is the next one. So a science note on this is sleep and rest consolidate learning and the HRV often improves as sleep recovery deepen.

Sarah Tacy [00:28:32]:

So we think with this integration we normalize. And in that normalization we can go like, oh, this becomes compost. Then the S is support. This is layers of support. So if you think of my story of being exposed to thousands of people, so 2,300 people signed up for the free program. My newsletter list tripled and it was a big exposure for my system. It might be small for one of my friends who has, who have much bigger followings, but for my system it was bigger. So the S is again the practices, the environment being witnessed in contraction interrupts the isolation spiral.

Sarah Tacy [00:29:29]:

And again when I'm support is like cup of tea, warm blanket, feet on the earth, time in nature, place in the schedule. You can probably see that this support very much matches up with the preparation. It's almost like a preparation or support sandwich. So we're putting the support here as well. And that the CO regulation again helps bring out the oxytocin, which again softens the HPA axis and widens tolerance. So I'll take a big inhale and an exhale. I like to do that because I'm like, oh, I need that. As I'm working through this very logistical podcast.

Sarah Tacy [00:30:16]:

As you know, I'm more, a little bit more usually of A storyteller here, and I'm really working through this idea in real time. So the M is momentum. You probably have often heard me talk about the power of breaking momentum and slowing down. The contraction is the slowing down. It is the breaking of momentum. And so what this is saying is like, great, we've had the contraction, We've gotten the lessons, We've created safety in the body. We've created layers of support. Now let's start the momentum again and stack for the micro wins.

Sarah Tacy [00:30:55]:

So you start listing the micro wins. If it were financial, you'd be like, you know, what, say, say the contraction, expansion, expansion, contraction was you made more money than you've ever made. And then suddenly these bills that you totally forgot about, like, show up and you couldn't have predicted. And it just seems like you're always going back to the same baseline. If the story is I always go back to the same baseline, you'll see that as your forever pattern. If you stack the micro winds, you go, wow, I made more than I've ever made. And I was able to pay off those bills. And I feel safe in my body, and I know that I can do that again.

Sarah Tacy [00:31:38]:

And I reached out to a friend and I let them see me in this place of vulnerability. And I went for a walk, and I'm taking a pause, an inhale, and an exhale. And my dear ones still love me, and I still love myself. And then you go and take your next right step. Small completions reshape again. The way that our reticular activating system is going to build the story in our brain. It is also going to give us little hope, little hits of dopamine, but in a way where our system has earned them over time, it's going to help us take appropriate risk. So here's why PRISM works.

Sarah Tacy [00:32:27]:

Preparation gives a net. Recognition catches spirals. Early integration, that includes normalization turns dips into data support means you're not carrying it alone. And momentum compounds into identity. I am someone who grows sustainably. Now, we could go through all of this, and I'm just kind of looking at the time here. I'm like, do we want to go through all of this? Like the. We could do it through, like, the theme of care and love.

Sarah Tacy [00:33:02]:

We could do it through the theme of finances and visibility. I'm gonna say, let's give it a try. At any point, I give myself permission to stop if I feel like I'm hitting the same topic too many times. But repetition can help land information in the body. I would Even say if you take this for a walk when you. For many people, when they walk and listen, it helps to integrate so in care and love your preparation can look like if you have a hard conversation come up, you can plan repair rituals, you can plan for tea after conflict, you can plan to talk to a friend, you can go for a walk with your dog. Part of preparation might even be deep self care and helping to come into a resonant regulated place before the conversation, writing things down, getting your thoughts out, exercising. If you have a big fight energy when you're going into a relational thing, it might be helpful to go for a run to push some weights and to really get some of the energy out so that you have more clarity and are speaking more from a place of heart and love and compassion, which still does allow for boundaries.

Sarah Tacy [00:34:30]:

The recognition if you're in all or nothing like say you recognize okay, my fists are clenched and I have told the story. We're doomed. Then you can name it and breathe Microsensations, macro stories normalize. We've hit a wave. This is a part of intimacy. I can compost it by naming it. This is part of speaking for my truth, being in my authentic self. This is kind of the we can do hard things and it's normal that it doesn't all feel great all the time.

Sarah Tacy [00:35:11]:

The support sandwich comes in now where we call a trusted friend journal. We co regulate where we can and then taking the momentum to celebrate the micro repair. It may be a smile, a hug, a laugh. It may be a repair you make with your friend or other. This reticular activating system of we can repair or show me how. But there's also the I've really stood in my truth. Really stood in my truth. So we have preparation, recognition, integration through normalization, support and momentum in finances.

Sarah Tacy [00:35:57]:

So again what we're looking for is to unhook stories that drag us down. Stories that say because I feel bad during this collapse, during this contraction, I remember every other time that that is true. And my reticular activating system and my default mode network start hooking onto old stories and rerunning that neurocircuitry through the body and the brain. So we want to unhook that through this process we have the preparation. I would say preparation is working on a daily basis to do nervous system techniques to feel safe in the body before the money is there. This can sound way easier if finances are generally stable and if you have always been fighting to pay your bill that might be like that would sound Easy for you to say. But what I promise you is that the more you work on nervous system tools and practices, the clearer our brains can think to even come up with creative problem solving. So the preparation is possibly the tools.

Sarah Tacy [00:37:07]:

The preparation, like working with theory planning, which is not going to be available for all people. But for me, what that does is, okay, I can look at where I am saving, I can look at investments. And so that if every month doesn't look as good and there's more up and down, I can say, here is where I'm putting in the buffer. So I'm putting in nervous system buffers and I'm putting in physical buffers that allow me to not be on a high. What's often considered like summer energy, where I'm always in expansion. My dad ran a business for 40 years and he was, I took so much pride in his ability to look at patterns in the business over the years and predict things often better than the bank did could predict them. And he just knew his numbers really well and therefore he saw patterns and therefore he got less tied into like, oh my God, it's so slow. It's like, oh, yeah, this time of year it tends to be slower.

Sarah Tacy [00:38:12]:

This is our busiest time of the year. These are the things that help. That is all. Preparation, recognition, scarcity. Story is rising. First body check, microsensing jaw, gut breath, then macro stories. Are there all or nothing stories? Okay, I'm in a dip and it is a contraction, but I'm spiraling in this contraction. I'm hooked on the stories.

Sarah Tacy [00:38:48]:

So I'm going to first normalize the ups and downs and I'm going to ask with the tiniest data, informed tweak I can make. And then I'm going to add a layer of support. So now I'm on the S for prism. It may be a money buddy, it may be a coach, but generally in that moment too, it's like the butterfly hug where your arms cross and just back and forth up and down on your arms. It may be thudding your heels on the ground. It may be two hands on the heart and really pressing into your heart and taking a few breaths. These practices don't always heal you immediately. It can be repetition over time.

Sarah Tacy [00:39:31]:

And then with the momentum. We celebrate paying one bill, we celebrate sending one invoice. We celebrate any win that is bigger or better or different than an old pattern. We want to train your reticular, activating system to, to notice that you solve problems, that you break patterns and loops, that, yes, you've Been there before and maybe, yes, it happened again. But you see the micro differences and this really matters. To unhook yourself from a downward dysregulated loop and give yourself more support and more ease, to be more on that line of the decorative grass where every year, even though there's contraction and expansion, there is overall growth. Last visibility, the preparation Line up allies to, like, comment on a vulnerable post. Visibility man.

Sarah Tacy [00:40:30]:

Find your feet, find your center, find your breath. There's a lot of work of just finding love for self, which is preparation over time, repeated habits that you build that help recognition. One harsh comment, Pause. Heat in my face, flutter in my belly. And then the macro stories. Now I move to integration and normalization. Oh, that makes sense that my body wants to protect me. That was really scary.

Sarah Tacy [00:41:08]:

I don't like when someone criticizes me and I don't even know this person or I know this person and they just did that publicly. That makes sense, that I want to contract and run away. It makes sense. And once I can normalize it, it makes sense. I move on to support. I lean into a friend, I lean into a tree, I pet my dog, and I have practices to be in the discomfort while adding a layer of support. Literally, it could be a warm blanket, it could be a show, it could be a warm drink, a dip in the cold water, any of these things, right? Then momentum. After you have that down wave and you add in layers of support, you have the momentum.

Sarah Tacy [00:41:55]:

Let's say, like, I did it, I posted a thing. I recognize my pattern. I added layers of support. I'm still here. You know, it's like we get to even one of my friends who randomly, I'd say, like, she randomly checked in and was just like, hey, Sarah, no matter the outcomes, no matter what other people choose to do, you did something incredible. You integrated years of work and you came to a place of such clarity and you presented it in your authentic voice as yourself. That is such a win. That is the medicine for you.

Sarah Tacy [00:42:38]:

What other people do with that is their business. And it just really moved me. And I'm so happy that I got to have my downward spiral and I got to meet myself with all of the all or nothing stories. I got to have a moment of recognition. I got to call in layers of support and I got to get through the other side before the external situations changed. Once I got to the other side, I was able to mobilize and have some momentum. I was able and wanting to then, like, get back on Instagram Live. Jenraciope was like, hey, let's just do this together.

Sarah Tacy [00:43:19]:

Let's take a step. And it was like a friend holding my hand and we took the step. And then I sent out a newsletter after I had also sat with my parents and my mom was like, but here's what I want to know. And. And then another 15 people signed up. And the beauty was I got to have the whole process. I got to unhook myself from the all or nothing thoughts, add layers of support, find my micro wins. Before the external changed and you know, the external changed.

Sarah Tacy [00:43:50]:

And some people would say that is how quantum physics works and that's how magnetism works. But first I got to be with what was real. First I got to be with the authenticity of my real lived human experience. Which sure, in the middle of a launch, it's not super convenient because it's way more convenient just to say focused and yes, and I believe in this, but I really got to be with my human and I really got to practice prism. And after I went through a full wave, I got to get to the other side and the external, as I keep saying, the program literally filled, it's completely full. And now I get to just focus week by week on what is my way to show up again authentically and most usefully to my community. The last thing I might want to add is about capacity building and this is the range of resonance the long term game or the long game. So PRISM isn't a quick fix, although it can show up to be to help in acute situations.

Sarah Tacy [00:45:06]:

It's conditioning capacity grows in small actionable steps over a long period of time. So your range of resonance where you have the ability to choose pause, your ability to stay you in both the up wave and the down wave begins to grow without capacity contraction retriggers trauma physiology, which is the feeling of isolated, hopeless and choiceless. As you heard my story, I did also go to that place and PRISM in that practice help unhook me from a longer, bigger downward spiral and just help me to see some of the stories that were present. I got to disprove the stories and come out. This experience in itself again helps to build the conditions of a growing range of resonance. So with capacity contraction equals integration expansion becomes sustainable. The trend line rises even as the waves move. I will not go into daoism here, but this is.

Sarah Tacy [00:46:18]:

I studied in college and it helped me so much as an athlete where I used to spiral in the middle of every season and instead I could just go oh, this is the dao. This is the way some games I'm not meant to play as good as other as well as other games. And when I could release the hook from thinking I needed to be perfect all the time, I had so much more fun and I played better than I'd ever played. I would find my breath. I would look at a blade of grass, I would see the flag moving in with a breeze. I would take a breath. I would remind myself why I'm there. I'm here to have fun and I'm literally just in the dao.

Sarah Tacy [00:47:03]:

I'm in the way. It was so helpful and it's a reminder that I constantly need the science supports capacity over time. Repeated co regulation equals more oxytocin, a quieter HPA axis, a default mode network reopening to imagination and choice returns. Consistent recovery practices are going to give us a higher HRV baseline, which means more adaptability under stress. And our micro winds are going to help us create accurate labeling. The reticular activating system is going to shift from threat first. A lot of us get a lot of our pride actually from being like oh, I've struggled all these years and I'm so good under stress and I did this and I did that and I'm a mom of 10 kids and you know, and I had this happen and we can really build our identity on the way we come up against struggle. And this I would say would be like.

Sarah Tacy [00:48:10]:

Our micro winds can help lead not just from like I'm a tenacious person under pressure, but it can also be micro winds of like and I could relax and I put my feet in the grass and I recede to help. We start to broaden what's possible and start to move out of the me versus them, it's all on me to noticing with our micro winds too, all the layers of support not just that we created for ourselves but that we received from those around us. The earth, the energetic world, and possibly for some of you, the spirit world. Thank you all so much for taking time to really work through this with me. I got text message from a friend the other day that was asking specifically about this and I have had many clients who have asked about this and again, sometimes it's with love and sometimes it's visibility, sometimes it's finances and I just noticed that there's a tug in me this part that feels uneasy about just trying to build for expansion and so for me really recognizing that it is an upward growth trend with room and practices for expansion and contraction, contraction at almost every edge, layers of support and then small steps of momentum, gathering information of positive next right steps or wins that have already happened. Growth is biological. Contraction is biological. Upward spirals can happen when we stop shaming the wave and start resourcing it.

Sarah Tacy [00:50:04]:

PRISM preparation, recognition, integration of normalization, support and momentum is all part of how we build capacity per expansion to feel safe enough, whether that is with love, money or visibility. If today landed share this episode with a friend who's riding a big wave and if you want the next step, join us inside Resource to is currently running and so the best next step really is just to join the wait list. You can DM me, you can email supportaratacey.com and in a month or two we will send out a seven day practice to help remind you of PRISM. Small steps over time of practicing PRISM. If we were to end with a reticular activating system prayer it might be show me ways, show me maps. Show me examples of how we can start with health. Show me layers of support that sandwich expansion and contraction help me to normalize the waves so that I feel less alone and am more likely to reach out for companionship. May I remember we were never meant to do this alone.

Sarah Tacy [00:51:49]:

May I remember that resources are not just financial but multi dimensional. Show me support that comes in the form of schedules. Show me support that comes in the form of neighbors and family showing up. Show me support that comes in the way of ancestors. Show me support that comes in the way of a tree I can lean on, of food that was collected by farmers, of animals that would like co regulation and petting, of family and friends who show up and say I love you, I love you, I love you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Until next time. And again, if this was helpful, please share.

Sarah Tacy [00:52:39]:

And if you like this episode, please feel free to rate it. And that's all I have for now. Bye. Thank you for tuning in. It's been such a pleasure. If you're looking for added support, I'm offering a program that's totally free called 21 Days of Untapped Support. It's pretty awesome. It's very easy.

Sarah Tacy [00:53:08]:

It's very helpful. You can find it at SarahTacy.com and if you love this episode, please subscribe. And like, apparently it's wildly useful so we could just explore what happens when you scroll down to the bottom, subscribe rate, maybe say a thing or two. If you're not feeling it, don't do it. It's totally fine. I look forward to gathering with you again. Thank you.